My Path

I realized today that since I retired my India blog many people who know me now know very little about the Karen who once was and the journey from lost to found, from broken to restored, from hopeless to being given the greatest miracle of my life.

I was a prodigal son to say the least, but God reached down to me at my most broken and pulled me into His promises and purpose!  As a pro-life missionary many may not know that God gave us our miracle through IVF, and although I understand (and support) the pro-life communities stand on IVF I also know that God used this to give us a miracle He promised.  Due to my strong held beliefs on protecting all human life, never again would we pursue IVF. Our daughter, regardless of her manner of conception was and is a miracle and her story has reached many hearts.

I do not agree with the throwing away of life that often happens in IVF but we had 6 embryos and all 6 were implanted and I would have carried all 6 had God granted me that.  Also I believe that man can put egg and sperm together but man can not create life, I believe only God can grant life into that combination.  I look forward to meeting my 5 babies in Heaven and I wish that I could have known them all in this life.  I share this to show the miraculous ways that God works in our lives, this is our journey.  This was the start of God revealing the ministry He had planned.  Before this all happened I sat on the "I wouldn't have an abortion but who am I to tell others they can't" fence.  After I carried and gave birth to my daughter I knew that all lives absolutely had to be protected!  Here are links to that time in my life....

(For some reason the links won't hyperlink so copy and paste into your browser)
The beginning:
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2008/12/life-apart.html
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2009/01/new-begining.html
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2009/02/infertility.html
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2009/03/that-which-doesn-not-kill-you.html

The Miracle revealed
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2009/04/oh-baby.html
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2009/06/hi-my-name-is-karen.html
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2009/07/fertility-drugs-and-mini-donkeys.html
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2009/07/surrender.html
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2009/07/so-much-on-my-mind.html
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2009/07/day-has-been-chosen.html
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2009/07/my-little-embryos.html
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2009/08/if-you-dont-believe-in-miracles-its.html

Her name is Ella Mae
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2010/04/day-our-miracle-became-reality.html
http://av8rswife.blogspot.com/2010/05/gods-perfect-gift.html

SEX! It's Time To Talk About It!

As a LIFE Runner my mission is to not only protect women from abortion but to raise up youth to know and understand their worth and the design of purity in their lives.  I believe that empowering youth with the truth is the key to protecting future generations from abortion and its destruction of family and sexuality. Protecting and empowering our children is one of the most important things we will ever do as parents. My daughter is the most important person in the world to me and I will not leave her for the world to devour by not preparing her to face the struggles of being a young woman in this changing world! It is her father and my job to teach her about purity, sex, and Gods design for her life.

My heart is so heavily burdened by the state of things today.  Our youth are facing crisis after crisis and I am sad to say that in so many ways this is a reflection of how we as parents and the church have failed them.  It’s time to bring sex out of the darkness and into the light.  It is time for parents and the church to resume their role as guides of our youth and nothing is more at stake apart from their salvation than their purity!  The world is being led one way and our faith leads us another.  We must remember that it is our job as parents to lead our children, the enemy will come for them if we are not diligent!

Our complacency as a church and as parents has allowed the wolves to infiltrate.  You see, when we were unwilling to teach our children about sex, groups like Planned Parenthood gladly stepped in.  We have failed our youth because instead of teaching them about sex, about the design of their sexuality, about the risks and dangers of pre-marital sex, about STI’s and pregnancy, about the emotional and spiritual connection to sex, we have let Planned Parenthood and other secular groups teach them HOW to have sex, how to engage in uninhibited and unlimited sex.  They have taught them that nothing is off limits, that all things are admissible, that sex is for pleasure alone without consequence.  They have disregarded that sex is NOT for everyone at any time, that have not explained that it holds emotional and physical consequences that most teens are nowhere near able to deal with.  Parents put their daughters on birth control and forget to tell them that birth control won’t protect them from any STI and that condoms and birth control both fail at protecting from pregnancy, that the only way to be certain that you won’t get pregnant or end up with an STI is to abstain.  These young girls who are far to immature to be having sex then live in a false sense of security that they are “safe” from pregnancy which is entirely untrue. More and more evidence is coming to light that HPV, which is now causing cancer in both women and men is not stopped by condoms and is a very real risk to everyone every single time they have sex with or without a condom.  Estrogen plays a key factor in breast cancer and yet we are pumping our daughters full of this hormone with birth control! Birth control will not protect our youth from the emotional consequences of teen sex.  Condoms won't protect our teens from the insecurities and heartache that arise from giving yourself to someone so intimately but not understanding the gravity of revealing such a deeply personal and vulnerable piece of who they are.  Our teenagers are not being prepared for the emotional baggage they take on when they engage in such an intimate and mature commitment that is a sexual relationship, and we need to be talking to them about these things.  

It is clear that once we are married we would all be happy to have been our spouses one and only, and of course we expect to be the only person our spouse ever has sex with again.  Its interesting to me that people don’t see this double standard.  Before marriage we want to be able to have sex with whomever we please and we do not want marriage to be required, but once married we expect sex to be exclusive to our marriage!  Why?  If sex is nothing more than a carnal act of pleasure to be had at our own leisure than it surely is not significant enough to be restrained once married.  This only proves that sex is far more than a carnal act.  You see ALL sex has consequences!  Sex outside of marriage opens you to health risks (STIs and diseases), it can cause a pregnancy that was not planned and put the child at risk for abortion, it leads to emotional sorrow when relationships end, it leads to insecurities and opens the doors to abuse.  Sex inside of marriage leads to a bonding, strengthening the relationship and the welcoming of children inside of the safety of a committed relationship.  There are no marital benefits to pre-marital sex. Sex was designed for marriage and only constrained within marriage is it safe from dangerous and painful consequences.

We have failed our youth because we have failed to believe that they are capable of making good choices, that they are so pumped full of hormones that they couldn’t possibly ever abstain, and that is how we fail them!  We don’t spend enough time affirming them and helping them to understand who they are in the LORD. The youth are able to choose to save themselves, they are able to make good choices and the right choice for their future if we will set them on a firm foundation!  Its time to teach purity, to give the youth firm reasons to wait and to encourage them to talk about the things they are facing!  If our youth cannot talk to us about sex then they will turn to other youth and most are being guided by a morally decaying world leading them into destruction!  The music they listen to, the movies and tv shows they watch, their friends and the ever changing society around them is telling them to have sex. How can a young person tell you that they are being sexually abused if they don’t understand their bodies?  How can a young person know and understand boundaries if they can’t talk to us?  How can our youth make sound choices if they can’t get answers?  We cannot remain silent anymore!

Young men are drowning in pornography that will destroy their ability to have a physically intimate relationship in the future, but we turn a blind eye as groups like Planned Parenthood push pornography and masturbation like candy to our teens.  Young girls are so insecure in who they are that they seek physical affirmation from boys and men who have no care for them outside of their own sexual needs.  These girls are hurting and lost and are being further damaged as they seek what they will never find in the beds of boys who are not mature enough to protect and respect them.  Groups like Planned Parenthood tell these girls that rough sex is good, that filming sex is good, that the sky is the limit and worth exploring, but where are these groups when the young women find themselves being shamed for their sexual exploration, for their photos ending up on the Internet?  These groups are silent, and these children are left to pick up the broken pieces!  These youth are not mature enough to say the word penis or vagina without giggling but they are being told they are mature enough for sex!  The world is digging their claws into our children and it is time for us as parents and the church to take a stand! ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

Parents, take back your children!  Stop allowing the world to lead them and teach them about sex, it is our responsibility!  They need open conversation where they can tell us what they are facing and considering.  They need to be able to speak openly and honestly to us about the pressures they face, the things they desire and how to reconcile it all!  If you are raising a teen who is able to come to you and tell you that they are considering having sex then you are able to discuss with them all aspects of that decision.  If they are too scared to talk to you then they will simply seek counsel elsewhere that will most likely encourage them to have sex.  Talking about sex is not giving permission but simply being available to guide your child.  If you have a relationship with your child where they know they can talk to you about sex they will also have a place to turn if they ultimately choose sex.  They will need our loving guidance if they choose to go down that path and we need to be available to help our children in whatever they face. Many youth who have had sex desire to return to abstinence but need loving affirmation to get them back on the right path. We have got to stop treating sex like a hidden shame and start explaining its beautiful design and why God created it only for marriage!  The world is teaching one thing so we as parents and the church need to direct our youth back to what God says about all of this. Purity is possible!  Let's take the time to guide our children through this confusing time in their lives!

The Ashes of Defeat

Micah 7:8

Do not rejoice over me, O my enemy.  Though I fall I will rise; Though I dwell in darkness, the LORD is a light for me.

A good part of my life was spent being too scared to try anything for the fear of failure.  It was easier not to try, and so I accomplished very little.  I am nearly 40 and it makes me sad that I wasted so much time being scared to try.  When God got a hold of me that all changed!  I began taking risks, I was willing to step out in faith which meant I had to be willing to fail!

Although the fear of failure no longer stops me from trying, the fear still exists, maybe even more so because I hate the idea of letting God down.  When the fear rises, when I stumble and I fall flat on my face the devil is right there trying to keep me on the ground.  The enemy wants me shattered in defeat, too scared to try again.  The truth is that the devil has a lot to loose if I trust God and try again.  More often than not I need to be reminded that the devil is actually scared of us when we trust God, when we walk with God, when we push beyond the fear.  We are a threat to all that he has planned and if he can keep us crippled in fear then he might accomplish something, but when we step out in faith he loses every single time!  We need to remember that through the Holy Spirit we have power over the enemy and not the other way around!

Now is the time to choose to trust in the unseen, to take hold of victory!  Every failed attempt before was simply perfecting our faith, it only takes one time to succeed and we should look at every attempt as the time that success is at hand!  

Psalms 46:1

God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble.

God is all that I need, He isn’t far away unconcerned with me, he is VERY PRESENT!  That's a powerful statement.  He isn’t just there, he is VERY much there!

Psalms 46:5

God is in the midst of her, she will not be moved; God will help her when the morning dawns.

God is with me, He is the firm foundation that cannot be moved!  His mercies are brand new each day, He does not leave us, He is with us to help us!

Psalms 46:10 

“Cease striving and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.

Quit trying to get it done on your own!  God, the very God of all creation will help you if you will just trust Him and be still in His presence!  It’s not about us, it’s about Him and He is working it all out for His glory!  We need to stop carrying the full weight and put it down at the feet of the cross.  Victory is in the nail pierced hands and feet of Jesus, victory is at the empty tomb, victory is seated at the right hand of God, and victory is promised to those who put their faith in God alone!

I love the lyrics from the song “Resurrecting-Elevation Worship”

“In your Spirit I will rise, from the ashes of defeat

The resurrected King is resurrecting me

In Your Name I come alive to declare your victory”

I declare victory in the Name of Jesus!

Fancy Footwear

Photo credit to Grahame Stageman (used with permission)

Ephesians 6:15

and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace

As a runner one of my most important pieces of gear are my shoes!  I have to wear a neutral shoe, even a slight adjustment that causes me to under or over pronate and my legs will suffer quickly!  I recently bought a new pair of shoes after my marathon, but did not take the time I needed in the shoe store to feel them out.  Even after a few weeks of running in these new shoes, which caused me to slightly under pronate, the damage stopped me in my tracks.  This piece of gear was slightly off for my body, almost unnoticeable, but that was enough to have done some damage!  The lesson was a painful one, it required rest, massage, and a lot of foam rolling to rectify and has left a weakness in my tendon that I will have to be careful of in the future. 

Just like the importance of the right footwear in my running, is the right “footwear” in our faith!  Our footwear affects our footing! Its important enough to be part of the armor of God!  The NIV says “and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace.”

footing;

1. a secure grip with one’s feet.

2. he basis on which something is established or operates 

fitted;

1. to be appropriate or suitable for (a situation, etc.)

2. to be of the correct size or shape for (a connection, container, etc)

readiness;

1. the state of being fully prepared for something

2. willingness to do something

The gospel of peace is THE piece of equipment that we cannot go on without!  The Word of God is what prepares us for everything we have ahead, but it's not just given, it's fitted to us, or more accurately I should say we are fitted to it!  The Word is our very foundation! If we are spending time in the Word, see how we can live according to the Word.  We begin to truly understand how are lives are to be lived and how we can walk that out in our day to day service!  No matter what we will face, no matter how we are called, the Word is our guide! If I had taken more time in the shoe store I would have noticed the problem with the shoes and if I take more time in the Word I will notice things in my life that may be off as well!  The only way to grow in faith is to get into the Word, get alone with God, seek Him and wait on Him!

Galatians 5:25

If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.

With our feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace we can walk by the Spirit.  This is the state of being conscious of Gods presence with us at all times.  When we are aware of His constant presence it helps us to walk in His will and to avoid sin.  We live by the Spirit through our salvation but we must choose to walk by the Spirit!  Putting on the full armor of God every day will help us to continue to serve God in the ways that He calls.

Our faith walk is an ultra marathon.  We have a long way to go, and there will be days that feel impossible and days that feel like the wind is at our back, but with God all things are possible and we need only draw near to Him to find the strength to press forward!

He Speaks In Whispers

I love the way God speaks to my heart! I love the way He encourages, He builds up, He redirects and He corrects.  This week I am preparing to speak at a Woman Conference and every single time I am invited to speak two things happen.  Firstly, the enemy attacks. He attacks me, he attacks my family, he tries to attack my peace.  Secondly, God moves in and encourages. He builds up, He directs, and He protects!  This week was no different!

As I sat in Church Sunday morning I found myself lost in worship laying all of my burdens at Gods feet.  I felt one thing being clearly spoken to my heart.  “I am going to use all of it for good, not one bit of it will be wasted. I will use it all!”  I felt encouraged by this, reminded that no matter what I have been through God has gotten me to this point.  Even the wrong turns He has and will continue to use for His purpose.  

The service was outstanding.  We had a visiting group called the Covenant Players and they ministered in drama.  They were fun and engaging, but the message was rock solid and hit each of us in a unique way.  The final drama was the one that left me trembling with thankfulness.  This drama reached me on a level that I needed to have reached.  It solidified in me all that I am going through and showed me, in part, the why.

I won’t explain the whole play, but I am going to tell you what it was to me.

The scene opens with a woman traveling a great upward journey, she is heavily laden with packs, she is dirty, hungry and exhausted.  She collapses and takes off all of her packs and decides that rest is what she needs most and so she sleeps.  While she sleeps God ministers to her in her dreams and refreshes her.  Now as this scene is opening my heart was crying out “why are you carrying so much weight?” Thinking I was so clever, I thought the play would be about laying down ones burdens, casting off the weight, giving it all to God, but I was wrong!  

As she awakens refreshed she goes to get something to eat out of her pack, but before she can eat, even though she is famished she sees another traveler.  This traveler is hurt and looks a mess.  She leaves her food to attend to the weary  traveler.  Now I’m thinking “oh this will be about being a good Samaritan,” but again, I was wrong, it was so much more!

The weary traveler has had enough of this upward journey and is headed back down to the “comforts and safety” of normality.  She is done, it's too hard and she is ready to give up the path she is on.  From her point of view climbing this trail is impossible.  She is hurt, she is broken and she has had enough! (Man I know what that feels like, don’t we all?)

This faithful traveler goes on to talk about how she has been there, but prayer and faith keep her climbing.  She begins to attend to the weary travelers needs, first tending her wounds with the first aid kit she is carrying in her pack, then she pulls out food and fresh clothing to give to her.  The weary traveler is still insisting that she will not return to the path and that she is headed back, and that she should save her supplies.  The faithful traveler begins to take off the weary travelers ruined shoes and wash her feet, the weary traveler breaks down and begins to allow her to help, still asking her why.  The faithful traveler continues to pull things from her pack and supply the weary traveler.  She explains of how her faith and prayer have gotten her through and how the weary traveler simply can’t give up.  In the end she gives the weary traveler, who has agreed to go on, her spare pack realizing that she has carried it all this way for this very moment…..

That was it for me, that was the answer I have been seeking.  So many times the weight of all that I carry seems impossible.  Some of the weight that I carry is from my own mistakes of the past.  Some, is from accepting Gods call on our family to go out into the world and to serve Him.  The weight seems so heavy at times and there are days I don’t understand why God doesn’t lift it from my shoulders.  I realized that I am carrying these things because I need them to be with me when I cross the path of someone who will benefit from what God has given me to share.  I got chills as I remembered that just an hour earlier God reminded me that He will “use it all, nothing will be wasted,” and now He was allowing me to see what He meant!  I could hardly contain my tears as I came to understand that as I continue this “upward journey” I will carry extra “baggage” with me, but it won’t be to harm me, it is not to punish me, it is to prepare me to help someone else! 

Even more amazing, is that with every opportunity to minister to others, I am able to use things I have learned from my own past to encourage them in the right direction.  It makes me relatable as they see my sincerity of the pain those wrong choices caused.  Even more, with every opportunity to minister to another, the weight gets less as I give them the "item" in my “pack” meant for that moment!  Praise God, it makes my heart soar just thinking about it!  

It is not easy! Some of the sacrifices my family makes to be here seem monumental, but now more than ever it is worth it!  This week has been rough for Ella Mae, and therefore rough for us all, but with every struggle God continually reminds me of His promise to my family…

Jeremiah 29:11

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

When I turned my life back over to Jesus and I said “yes God” to whatever He had planned, God was also promising to provide for our family in every way.  He is the cornerstone in our family and we will go where called, whenever He calls. He has faithfully provided and I have no doubt that He will continue to do so!  There are some days where the weight of it all seems so heavy, but now I understand that weight!  It is not a punishment, it is a provision! Something meant for someone else that we have the blessing to deliver, but it requires us to carry it for some time!  About two years ago I began praying for God to “break my heart for what breaks His,” and more and more I feel that happening.  To understand why some burdens have been left while others have been lifted is one of the most encouraging messages I have ever received! It is a blessing to carry weight for others.  After all, we are called to love one another and bear one another’s burdens!

No matter where you are in life, or what your circumstances you face, stay on the upward path!  Don’t give up!  Your pack may be heavy today so you can bless someone tomorrow!  You never know who is carrying what you need and how close they are to bringing it to you!  He never asks us to carry a burden alone, He is always there sharing the weight and when we don't have any more to give He provides in every way! If we trust God and continue to say yes to Him then He will continue to pour into our lives as we become the hands and feet of Jesus here on this planet!

Heaven is Cheering

Hebrews 12:1

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles.  And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us

Suva Marathon has a special place in my heart.  It is the only marathon in Fiji and it was the first marathon I ever ran.  It is such a high energy and enthusiastic race.  This year there were less than 100 marathon runners but over 1,000 runners attending between the full/half/team marathon/10k. Its small enough for intimacy but big enough to be energetic! 

The race starts before sunrise and this year we would run a new course so I was nervous because I am always back of the pack at the start. Knowing that we would be running through a park in the dark and not knowing my way made me anxious.  I had my headlamp and a few people had torches, but the race coordinators did something outstanding that really made this race stand out to me.  They asked anyone with a phone to go into the park and light the way for the runners.  On top of onlookers the path inside the park was lined with cadets in white shirts and torches who were standing guard to light the way.  I’m getting goosebumps just writing it out.  This experience was beyond anything I have experienced before at a race or anywhere to be honest.

We took our first lap out on the street before entering the dark park.  I was, of course, behind the pack but then as I neared the park my heart lifted, the sound of joyous cheers pouring from the darkened park drew me in with so much energy I simply could not stop laughing and smiling.  This part of the loop course became known (to me) as the “re-energize station” because there was simply so much cheering going on. I entered this park and the path was lined with soft inviting light and hundreds of cadets standing guard, their white t-shirts standing out as beacons.  They cheered, they encouraged and the sounds of encouragement poured from the park.

As I left the park and started down the darkened street on the course I felt my heart come to a place of understanding.  This is what heaven sounds like as we serve and press on down here on earth.  The angel armies are cheering us on, they are lighting the way, they are encouraging us.  The overflow of it is enough to give you courage in the dark spots and the rough patches!  My heart pounded excitedly every time I neared the park because I knew the cheering would start again but I also carried with me the understanding that heaven cheers us on like this all of the time!  What a beautiful thought!

This race was a time for me to spend in prayer and I was so thankful to carry so many prayer requests with me as I ran for the 5 long hours.  Our teammates were set out across most of the cheer stations and did such a great job cheering the runners and walkers on.  I could not be more proud of every last LIFE Runner who attended!  Those who ran poured out onto the course with enthusiasm and it lifted my spirits to see them! I was privileged to run with Pst Vijay for a short while where we could pray together and encourage one another on through our marathon. We had two of us running the marathon, one half marathon runner, two team marathon groups and a bunch of LIFE Runners in the 10K.  One of our team marathon groups came in second place! Everyone gave the race their all and I am so very proud of their efforts!  The cheerers were outstanding.  These LIFE Runners stood and cheered and passed out water for five hours, I'm so thankful for their dedication!  How many people were impacted by their kindness and their presence we may never know, but they shined the message of hope for all to see!

Every race teaches me something new, every race experience has something new to offer me, and what I walked away with from this race was BE ENCOURAGED! Heaven is cheering us on as we reach further out with love and compassion to those who are hurting and scared.  We “REMEMBER the Unborn” by being focused on the born, by helping mothers, by encouraging fathers, by talking to and praying with those who are struggling.

I run for one reason and one reason only, to serve God in the ministry of LIFE Runners.  There is not a single finish line I have crossed on my own strength.  God alone has given me the strength to make it through.  God alone carries me when I have nothing left to give and it is God alone who receives the glory.  I run because God healed my body and called me to a ministry of runners.  I run because it makes me rely on Him more and trust my own abilities less.  I run because I can and I will until God leads me to stop.  I know that every time I walk out the door to train or to race that I am a living billboard of hope to those who need to hear the message of truth.  I will run this race marked out before me so that God can continue to refine me, to discipline me, to teach me and to change me!

Psalms 26:2

Test me, LORD, and try me, examine my heart and my mind

This race was hard, it was really hard.  My body has not had any time to rest since the start of the year and there is no rest coming until around December as tomorrow I begin training for the Pensacola Marathon. The best moment of the race was when my beautiful daughter took my hand and ran with me across the finish line.  Many of our teammates lined the home stretch and my beautiful sisters in Christ, Esther and Mila, ran the flag in behind me.  It was the best moment, to be cheered on by loved ones when you are at your last bit of courage!  Heaven is always cheering and I will carry that with me forever!

All In Christ for Pro-Life!

**I obtained permission from N Studios Multi Media to post a few of their professional photos.  The photos with their website on them are theirs and I want to give them credit.**

Who Am I Offending

We as Christians need to be more concerned about how the things we say and do affect our relationship with the Holy Spirit than how they affect other people.  The Holy Spirit is easily grieved and yet we treat Him with so much disrespect and disloyalty at times that its hard to imagine why He continues to stick with us!  It’s easy to forget that the Holy Spirit is an invited friend, not a third wheel!

We are teaching our daughter that when she invites friends over for play dates that she needs to let them decide what they want to play.  They are the guests and that is a courtesy we expect her to extend.  I may be teaching my 7 year old this etiquette but I forget all to easily to extend this same courtesy to the Holy Spirit.  One of the things God gave us was free will, that means the Holy Spirit will only ever be an invited guest while we walk this earth.  He will never force Himself upon us but He does want to be in our lives and even when we grieve Him He doesn’t go far away, but He does “lift” His anointing from us and waits for us to return to Him.  My heart hurts to think how often I drive Him away with a harsh tone to my daughter, or a grumbling spirit with my husband, not to mention any other behaviors that make me unapproachable by Him.  The Holy Spirit is, after all, God and therefore cannot engage or be near sin.  Once we have received the Holy Spirit He doesn’t leave us, but we lose out on intimate fellowship when we push Him away with the things we say and do.

We need to get serious right now, as Christians saved by grace we receive the Holy Spirit to help us and guide us. Although we may be sealed with the Holy Spirit for the day of redemption, that does not mean we get to live how we want.  If you are engaged in lifestyle sin; sexual immorality (premarital sex, homosexual sex, pornography, adultery, etc), stealing, lying, swearing, drunkenness, drugs, idolatry, etc. then the anointing of the Holy Spirit will lift from you and you will not continue to hear Him clearly or to grow in the ways you otherwise would.  You cannot have an active, growing relationship with God while living in sin, the sin will drive a wedge between you and God.  Its kind of like your favorite radio station, as you get further and further out of range you will lose reception and won’t hear the music clearly, but as you draw closer to the source the songs become clear!  The clarity of our interactions with the Holy Spirit is affected by how near or far to Him we are walking.  Just like your radio station, even if you can’t hear it, it is still there, it didn’t disappear, its just out of range! Want to hear clearly, get as close as you can to the source! Choosing to live for Christ means to die to the sins that try to captivate us, you can’t have it both ways.  I love how my pastor put it Sunday when he was giving a message on fellowship with the Holy Spirit, “If we want to fellowship with the Holy Spirit we need to do the things that He likes to do, much like Esther, who to catch the eye of the King adorned herself in things that he liked.”  The Holy Spirit is an invited guest so don’t make Him feel like an outsider in your life!  

A study I am doing “Holy Fire” discusses the description of the Holy Spirit as a dove as a meaningful illustration.  Doves are easily startled and will not stay where they do not feel safe.  The Bible warns us not to grieve the Holy Spirit, the word grieve doesn’t just speak of mourning a loss but can also mean to hurt ones feelings. Another great piece of advice “Find out what grieves the Holy Spirit and don’t do that.” ~R.T. Kendall

Ephesians 4:30

And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.

The Holy Spirit was given to us, when Jesus returned to Heaven, to help us and guide us.  The Holy Spirit is God and often we don’t give the Holy Spirit the reverence He is due.  What kind of movies and TV shows are you watching? I hear so many Christians say they watch Game of Thrones and I am floored by this, the pornographic sex scenes alone should be enough to convict. Yes, I admit I started this series until I was convicted, as with most TV series that I haven’t made it through.  The truth is that there are very few acceptable shows and movies left for Christians to watch and yet many continue watching them and then wonder why their spiritual life is not prospering!  The Holy Spirit cannot stay close when we are doing things that are contrary to the morality of our faith!  Just the other day my heart was heavily convicted about a show we were watching.  It really didn’t seem too bad, but the swearing increased with each episode.  I became more and more uneasy with the show and then Ryan and I got into a little bit of an argument over something and I swore at him!  I don’t swear, I gave up swearing along with other very un-Christ like behaviors when I returned to the Lord, so for me to swear at him in a small argument broke my heart to the core.  I realized that exposing myself to this language had allowed it to begin to absorb.  We have not watched the show since, and I am committed to continuous interaction with the Holy Spirit, which means that I can’t be doing or around things that He isn’t willing to do or be around.

We need to ask ourselves how He would feel about ALL of our behaviors!  The Holy Spirit is not a tag along!  He wants to link arms with us and walk side by side with us, but we need to be sure we are headed where He is willing to go!  If I were to rightly picture the Holy Spirit as a physical person by my side for even just one full day I have a feeling my day might look different.  If that person could also read my thoughts and I was fully exposed to that person in every way I would most certainly be on my best behavior.  The song you are singing along with right now, would you sing it to your child? Better yet would you want your child singing it, in church?  No? Then turn it off! We can’t party at the bar on a Saturday night and hope to somehow be changed Sunday morning in church, I know, I tried that for almost a decade! We have to choose to change, to set ourselves apart from the ways of the world to be usable and sensitive to the things God has for us. We have forgotten that to be a Christian is to live as Christ, and I don’t know about everyone else, but I have a long way to go!  I need to structure my day around the things God would want me to be doing and not so much about what Karen wants.

I love that my pastor spoke about this, about the relationship with the Holy Spirit.  I tell you what, if you are not attending a truth speaking, Bible preaching, spiritual housekeeping, growing, worshiping church you are robbing yourself!  Church shouldn’t be a place we go to for a pat on the back and a nice cheery message!  It should be a place we go to grow, a place where we are available to learn, to be corrected, to desire change, and to be pushed forward to serve.  I am thankful that I have a Pastor who is more concerned with grieving the Holy Spirit and less concerned with being popular!  He is leading his flock well.  Many pastors today are sadly leading their flock astray with feel good messages and not speaking the truth in these socially changing times.  Sin is still sin even if everyone else says it is OK.  Morality is not based on popular opinion or changing times, but on the very word of God, the foundation of truth laid out from the very beginning.  The Bible is the unchanging word of God and it is relevant today as it was 2000 years ago.

Galatians 5:24

Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.

I have chosen to follow Jesus, which means my desires need to be laid at the cross.  Its a choice to choose the desires of God over my personal desires.  This life, the life of a Christian is no longer mine, it is surrendered to God.  I choose to live by the Spirit, which means that I need to walk by the Spirit.  That means I make a conscious effort to include the Holy Spirit in my whole day, and let Him lead me.  I commit to being more concerned with honoring the Holy Spirit then worrying about hurting my neighbors feelings, when truth needs to be spoken.  I have invited the Holy Spirit into my life which means He is a valued guest and I will honor His presence so that He will choose to continue to walk with me!  Christianity isn’t just church on Sunday, it is a lifestyle, it is the way you conduct yourself when others aren’t looking as well as in public.  It is a genuine choice to follow Jesus and forsake all else.  We don’t see that much anymore, I know that I fall short daily! People want the assurance of salvation but they don’t want to do the dying.  They want Christ to take their sins, but they want to keep their lifestyles.  We can’t have it both ways.  We must choose to love God more than our lives!

Luke 10:27

And he answered, “You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself.”

When we love someone with all of our heart we do everything we can not to hurt them.  When we love someone with all of our soul it means that we love them truly and deeply, not just on the surface, but literally live for them.  When we love someone with all of our strength it means that all of our effort goes into loving them, nothing is spared for self.  When we love someone with all of our mind it means that our thoughts, and the pattern of how we think is directed towards them.  WOW, I know I don’t love God as I am commanded to, I think of myself way too much to live up to this.  The Holy Spirit helps us draw nearer to this level of love, but we can only continue on this journey if we become like minded with the Spirit.  How many of us hunger for growth that just doesn’t seem to come, or breakthrough that seems just beyond reach.  I wonder if we truly give the Holy Spirit His rightful place of worship and relationship in our lives if we won’t see the very walls of Jericho fall before us!  God wants to do big things in our lives, He is simply waiting on us, and I am ready to try to be more available and conscience of the desires of the Holy Spirit!  I want to see mountains move!