SEX! It's Time To Talk About It!

As a LIFE Runner my mission is to not only protect women from abortion but to raise up youth to know and understand their worth and the design of purity in their lives.  I believe that empowering youth with the truth is the key to protecting future generations from abortion and its destruction of family and sexuality. Protecting and empowering our children is one of the most important things we will ever do as parents. My daughter is the most important person in the world to me and I will not leave her for the world to devour by not preparing her to face the struggles of being a young woman in this changing world! It is her father and my job to teach her about purity, sex, and Gods design for her life.

My heart is so heavily burdened by the state of things today.  Our youth are facing crisis after crisis and I am sad to say that in so many ways this is a reflection of how we as parents and the church have failed them.  It’s time to bring sex out of the darkness and into the light.  It is time for parents and the church to resume their role as guides of our youth and nothing is more at stake apart from their salvation than their purity!  The world is being led one way and our faith leads us another.  We must remember that it is our job as parents to lead our children, the enemy will come for them if we are not diligent!

Our complacency as a church and as parents has allowed the wolves to infiltrate.  You see, when we were unwilling to teach our children about sex, groups like Planned Parenthood gladly stepped in.  We have failed our youth because instead of teaching them about sex, about the design of their sexuality, about the risks and dangers of pre-marital sex, about STI’s and pregnancy, about the emotional and spiritual connection to sex, we have let Planned Parenthood and other secular groups teach them HOW to have sex, how to engage in uninhibited and unlimited sex.  They have taught them that nothing is off limits, that all things are admissible, that sex is for pleasure alone without consequence.  They have disregarded that sex is NOT for everyone at any time, that have not explained that it holds emotional and physical consequences that most teens are nowhere near able to deal with.  Parents put their daughters on birth control and forget to tell them that birth control won’t protect them from any STI and that condoms and birth control both fail at protecting from pregnancy, that the only way to be certain that you won’t get pregnant or end up with an STI is to abstain.  These young girls who are far to immature to be having sex then live in a false sense of security that they are “safe” from pregnancy which is entirely untrue. More and more evidence is coming to light that HPV, which is now causing cancer in both women and men is not stopped by condoms and is a very real risk to everyone every single time they have sex with or without a condom.  Estrogen plays a key factor in breast cancer and yet we are pumping our daughters full of this hormone with birth control! Birth control will not protect our youth from the emotional consequences of teen sex.  Condoms won't protect our teens from the insecurities and heartache that arise from giving yourself to someone so intimately but not understanding the gravity of revealing such a deeply personal and vulnerable piece of who they are.  Our teenagers are not being prepared for the emotional baggage they take on when they engage in such an intimate and mature commitment that is a sexual relationship, and we need to be talking to them about these things.  

It is clear that once we are married we would all be happy to have been our spouses one and only, and of course we expect to be the only person our spouse ever has sex with again.  Its interesting to me that people don’t see this double standard.  Before marriage we want to be able to have sex with whomever we please and we do not want marriage to be required, but once married we expect sex to be exclusive to our marriage!  Why?  If sex is nothing more than a carnal act of pleasure to be had at our own leisure than it surely is not significant enough to be restrained once married.  This only proves that sex is far more than a carnal act.  You see ALL sex has consequences!  Sex outside of marriage opens you to health risks (STIs and diseases), it can cause a pregnancy that was not planned and put the child at risk for abortion, it leads to emotional sorrow when relationships end, it leads to insecurities and opens the doors to abuse.  Sex inside of marriage leads to a bonding, strengthening the relationship and the welcoming of children inside of the safety of a committed relationship.  There are no marital benefits to pre-marital sex. Sex was designed for marriage and only constrained within marriage is it safe from dangerous and painful consequences.

We have failed our youth because we have failed to believe that they are capable of making good choices, that they are so pumped full of hormones that they couldn’t possibly ever abstain, and that is how we fail them!  We don’t spend enough time affirming them and helping them to understand who they are in the LORD. The youth are able to choose to save themselves, they are able to make good choices and the right choice for their future if we will set them on a firm foundation!  Its time to teach purity, to give the youth firm reasons to wait and to encourage them to talk about the things they are facing!  If our youth cannot talk to us about sex then they will turn to other youth and most are being guided by a morally decaying world leading them into destruction!  The music they listen to, the movies and tv shows they watch, their friends and the ever changing society around them is telling them to have sex. How can a young person tell you that they are being sexually abused if they don’t understand their bodies?  How can a young person know and understand boundaries if they can’t talk to us?  How can our youth make sound choices if they can’t get answers?  We cannot remain silent anymore!

Young men are drowning in pornography that will destroy their ability to have a physically intimate relationship in the future, but we turn a blind eye as groups like Planned Parenthood push pornography and masturbation like candy to our teens.  Young girls are so insecure in who they are that they seek physical affirmation from boys and men who have no care for them outside of their own sexual needs.  These girls are hurting and lost and are being further damaged as they seek what they will never find in the beds of boys who are not mature enough to protect and respect them.  Groups like Planned Parenthood tell these girls that rough sex is good, that filming sex is good, that the sky is the limit and worth exploring, but where are these groups when the young women find themselves being shamed for their sexual exploration, for their photos ending up on the Internet?  These groups are silent, and these children are left to pick up the broken pieces!  These youth are not mature enough to say the word penis or vagina without giggling but they are being told they are mature enough for sex!  The world is digging their claws into our children and it is time for us as parents and the church to take a stand! ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

Parents, take back your children!  Stop allowing the world to lead them and teach them about sex, it is our responsibility!  They need open conversation where they can tell us what they are facing and considering.  They need to be able to speak openly and honestly to us about the pressures they face, the things they desire and how to reconcile it all!  If you are raising a teen who is able to come to you and tell you that they are considering having sex then you are able to discuss with them all aspects of that decision.  If they are too scared to talk to you then they will simply seek counsel elsewhere that will most likely encourage them to have sex.  Talking about sex is not giving permission but simply being available to guide your child.  If you have a relationship with your child where they know they can talk to you about sex they will also have a place to turn if they ultimately choose sex.  They will need our loving guidance if they choose to go down that path and we need to be available to help our children in whatever they face. Many youth who have had sex desire to return to abstinence but need loving affirmation to get them back on the right path. We have got to stop treating sex like a hidden shame and start explaining its beautiful design and why God created it only for marriage!  The world is teaching one thing so we as parents and the church need to direct our youth back to what God says about all of this. Purity is possible!  Let's take the time to guide our children through this confusing time in their lives!